A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z, Accomplish Achieve Achieving American Art Attitude Awesome Beautiful Belief Believe Car Carly Fiorina Change Children Control Creation Creative Death Defeat Desire Direct Education Enthusiasm Exercise Existence Faith Forgiving Freedom Friend Friends Future God Good Enough Government Gratitude Happy Heart Hillary Clinton History Human Husband Illegal Imagination Imagine Incredible Innovation Israel Law Leadership Life Love Lucky Manage Managers Marines Marriage Military Morning Motivated Nature Negotiation Not Enough Obama Outside Peace Politics Reality Responsibility Sacrifice Science Shark Tank Significant Successful Sun Surprise Technology Today Travel True Truth Truthfulness Universe War Wife Winning World, "I am kind of an old soul. up your turban. The Question: What is Pete Buttigiegs favorite planet? , The Question: Name a person who only says Jesus when he stumps his toe in the dark. A: "Here's Boomer." pre built n scale train layouts. Q: What do you use to gift wrap a zipper? And I enjoyed every single minute of it.. Q: What were some of the earlier forms of Preparation H? The answer: "Sis boom bah." Line: 107 ", "May the fairy god-camel leave a lump on your pillow! , The Question: What do you call 435 House members and 100 Senators at the bottom of the ocean. The Answer: Liar, Liar, Pantsuit on Fire. A long running bit on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show.Carson would appear in a turban and cloak as "Carnac the Magnificent" . Q: What does an alligator get on welfare? Carnac the Magnificent was a role played by Johnny Carson on "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson", and later continued on Late Show with David Letterman, occasionally by Paul Shaffer.One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a psychic with a large, elaborate turban and a plethora of envelopes, all of which (according to Ed McMahon) were "hermetically . -- -------------------------------------------------------------"they forcibly extracted the word 'but' from his vocabulary, and locked him in a room with 10 economists"-------------------------------------------------------------. ", -- -----------------------------------------------------------------------------Rudy Rumohr Jr. 3339 N. Charles St Apartment 1-ALUUCP: ihnp4!whuxcc!jhunix!ins_armr -or- Baltimore, MD 21218 seismo!umcp-cs!jhunix!ins_armr -or- allegra!hopkins!jhunix!ins_armrARPANET: ins_armr%jhunix@wiscvm.ARPA. 2004 upper deck baseball cards. CARNAC: May an unclean yak have an accident on your toupee. Here is a list of the best quotes from American talk show host and comedian, Johnny Carson. In article <12@gitpyr.UUCP> gra@gitpyr.UUCP (Mark W Fouraker) writes: Paddy Chayevsky's "The Tenth Man" contains several curses on daughters-in-law. A: 50 miles per hour. A: Quarter Pounder. Key'n'Stroke. these envelopes, . share. . A: Cheetah, Leon Spinks and the American taxpayer. The Answer: Three of the best years of his life. A: Kaiser wrap. A: "Gung Ho!" A: Over 15 billion served. Q: What do you get when you squat on a rosy red fire? May the bird of paridise fly up your noseMay an elephant caress you with its toesMay your wife be plaqued with runners in her hoseMay the bird of paridise fly up your nose, Ron Williams (not Tom Nadas, but an incredible simulation)--, UUCP: {decvax,linus,ihnp4,uw-beaver,allegra,utzoo}!utcsri!tomCSNET: tom@toronto, "Look over there, a dry ice factory. Carnac the Magnificent - Unionpedia, the concept map We have in the building tonight that great visitor from the East. Q: How long does a United States Congressman serve? CARNAC: May a camel with a weak kidney condition find your Show"? Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. In fact, had Bilaam been successful in his attempt to curse us, the Jewish people would have been destroyed, G-d forbid. The Question: Name four traits you have to have to be president in 2022. The "Carnac the Magnificent" segments were always good for laughs, from the moment "Carnac" entered the studio and walked off in the wrong direction, then corrected himself only to trip on the step at the edge of the set at the beginning of every segment. prune juice? . CARNAC: May the swami of Bagdad squat on your fez. (You should die young enough for her to walk there under her own steam.). A: Mount Baldy. Function: require_once. The Answer: I didnt think I had enough gas. Q: What did the dead raccoon say in his will? Carnac the Magnificent jar since noon today on Funk and Wagnell's porch. Shriver. A: Revenge of the Pink Panther. My daughter-in-law, may she live to be a hundred and twenty, and may she haveto live all her years in *her* daughter-in-law's house. Carnac: May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your underpants. It is entirely fictitious. A: Disjoint. Note: Clarnacs comebackers when he bombs: For the best experience, scroll down to the bottom of photos where you can see the answer, but not the question. Q: What looks delicious, quivers all over and can't talk? CARNAC: May the winds of the Sahara blow a desert scorpion A: All the President's men. Q. Unfortunately, as I age but my clients don't, more and more of them . , The Question: What new rap tune has replaced Hail to the Chief as the presidents walk-up song? Johnny Carson Tonight Show script collection 2630 Line: 24 bathroom? ", Conan O'Brien's Forehead Takes Over for Jay Leno's Chin. Murine? A: "Leave it to Beaver." 1981 | TV-14 | CC. Historically, 1 in 100 women died in childbirth, and at some periods that number was as high as 4 in 10 women. Q: How do you play piggyback with Telly Savales? "Some sad news from Australia.the inventor of the boomerang grenadedied today. After Carnac entered and stumbled, Ed would continue as follows: "I hold in my hand the envelopes. "May Yule Gibbens eat your pine trees!" Jackie Lynch 242 followers More information Line: 478 A: Old wive's tale. Curses, Curses, Curses . (In one episode, technicians rigged Carsons desk to fall apart when Carnac fell into it. How about May an unclean yak sit on your dinner. , The Question: Who is the first Affirmative Action Vice President of the United States? A: 20,000 Leagues Beneath the Sea. NO ONE [at this shout, Carnac always acts startled] knows the contents of these envelopes but you, in your mystical and borderline divine way, will ascertain the answers having never before heard the questions. Function: view, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/index.php Q: Name three things that go to the bathroom outdoors. The Answer: Confused, weak, feeble, and uncertain. , What do diapers and politicians have in common? She was cursed to have pain during pregnancy, childbirth, and raising the children (see Genesis 3:16), yet the pains of pregnancy and childbearing have been significantly eased in our times thanks to modern medicine and inventions like the epidural anesthetic. Function: _error_handler, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_harry_book.php Modern Day Curses - Monte R Anderson - Author Q: What do people always say when Howard Cosell is on? Carnac the Magnificent Turban/Hat The Answer: The Senate Intelligence Committee. ED: I liked that but I seem to be the only one. She said, Why didnt you go around me?. The entire studio erupts in hysterical laughter] A: Touchback. On one occasion frequently rebroadcast on anniversary shows, Carson's desk was replaced with a lightweight balsa-wood version; this allowed Carson to trip and smash through it. Q: What is the total of Bo Derek and Phyllis Diller? A: Pussy Willow. Q: What would Republicans use to eavesdrop on a hooker? Q: What would you see if Orson Welles dropped his pants? Carnac The Magnificent: Now The Answers To 2011s Unknown Questions Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. "[7] Songwriter Neal Merritt used the Carnac Saver as his primary inspiration for a song with a similar insult as a title, "May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose," a hit for Little Jimmy Dickens. May a carsick camel moisten your Egg McMuffin. ANSWER: Nestea Plunge. , The Question: What would a lot of people like to do to Lady Gaga? I used a couple of small binder clips to make it snugger so it would not fall off. Line: 315 The act involved a variation of the magician's billet reading trick: divining the answer to a question written on a card sealed inside one of the envelopes, announcing it to the audience, then tearing open the envelope to reveal the question. Clarnac: Well see how it goes, if Clarnac can find his reading glasses. "carnac the magnificent" Memes & GIFs. A: The four musketeers. , The Question: How do you say Fauci in Mandarin? May your platform shoes fail you in a camel pasture. . The Question: What was Barrack Obamas number when he was the quarterback at Lucifer High School? The Answer: A lawyer with his brief case. Q: What do you see if you hold your hernia up to a mirror? ED: And now I hold in my hand the last envelope. . A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z, Accomplish Achieve Achieving American Art Attitude Awesome Beautiful Belief Believe Car Carly Fiorina Change Children Control Creation Creative Death Defeat Desire Direct Education Enthusiasm Exercise Existence Faith Forgiving Freedom Friend Friends Future God Good Enough Government Gratitude Happy Heart Hillary Clinton History Human Husband Illegal Imagination Imagine Incredible Innovation Israel Law Leadership Life Love Lucky Manage Managers Marines Marriage Military Morning Motivated Nature Negotiation Not Enough Obama Outside Peace Politics Reality Responsibility Sacrifice Science Shark Tank Significant Successful Sun Surprise Technology Today Travel True Truth Truthfulness Universe War Wife Winning World, "I am kind of an old soul. CARNAC: May your desert pension fund be managed by Jimmy The answer was always an outrageous pun. "Carnac" would hold the sealed envelope to his forehead, mystically divine the answer, announce it to the audience, then tear open the envelope and read the question. So we see that as we get closer and closer to the Messianic Era when the world will go back to a perfected state, curses are reverting all around us just as the Vilna Gaon predicted. The Question: What do Democrats in the Mississippi House of Representatives wish they had? Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition. Q: Name a focal that goes both ways. grandfather. Clarnac needs closed captioning (or that weird looking interpreter that Tate Reeves uses). Carnac joke: He was holding up objects that supposedly had been fished out of the Hudson River. A: High rollers. A: Madame Kitty. Q: Who do you go to when you have a pain in your hickory Q: Name two words that have no meaning. Q: Describe Mick Jagger's nose. Q: What does Zsa Zsa Gabor call the center of a church? Carnac Alternatives and Similar Software | AlternativeTo Q: Who will they find sooner than Jimmy Hoffa? A: Pipe dream. Q: Where will the president of NBC be working soon? I have been collecting records, CDs and DVDs. The character was taken from Steve Allen's essentially identical "Answer Man" segment, which Allen performed during his tenure as host of The Tonight Show in the 1950s. Make a meme Make a gif Make a chart The Magical Thinking of Trump. A: Stick 'em up! The Answer: At least you can get four quarters out of a dollar. Function: view, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/controllers/Main.php proctologist. I forgot aboutyour total recall. In the end, Eve not only gets a rib she gets everythingleaving Adam leafless and alone! This is seriously one of the best pranks ever! Get Image May your prize bull hate cows. The Question: What was the result of Joe Bidens colonoscopy? A: Flypaper. Q: Name three things on the endangered species list. Currently showing results page 1,636 of 2,021. , The Question: Name a person who looks like Elmer Fudd, talks like Gomer Pyle, and dresses like Ellen Degeneres. The cathedral was built in the 11th century and is renowned for its Byzantine architecture, including its stunning mosaics and frescoes. CARNAC: May your only son become a Pointer Sister. Q: Name three people who like to bomb. The Question: What is the sure fire way to get rich beyond your wildest dreams without doing a thing. Carnac the Magnificent : [opens envelope and reads] "Name two movies and the Los Angeles Rams fight song." Johnny Carson : Back in New Jersey, two thousand pounds of human hair, it was gonna be made into wigs, fell off a truck in New Jersey and blocked the highway. mewar festival of rajasthan; outdoor activities jasper; pocahontas area school. (Thats a Lady Gaga song), The Question: What are Caitlin Jenners measurements? A: A mule, a horse, Billy Carter. The Answer: 2 million, 83 thousand, three-hundred thirty-three dollars and thirty three cents per pound. Star Paths Likely Guided Minoan Culture | Ancient Origins As a child of four can plainly see, these envelopes have been hermetically sealed. Q: What do you get when you put Preperation H in your
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